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Two old guys are pushing their trolleys around the supermarket
when they collide. The first old guy says to the second guy,
"Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess
I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
The second old guy says,
"That's OK. It's a coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too,
and I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate."
The first old guy says, "Well, maybe I can help you find her.
What does she look like?"
The second old guy says,
"Well, she is 27 years old, tall with blonde hair, blue eyes,
long legs, big & firm in front, cute tight behind and wearing Hot pants.
What does your wife look like?"
To which the first old guy says,
"Never mind. Let's look for yours."
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
A Small White Dot
A kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out something
exciting and relate it to the class the next day.
When the time came to present what they'd found, the first little boy the
teacher called on walked up to the front of the class, and with a piece of
chalk, made a small white dot on the blackboard and sat back down.
Puzzled, the teacher asked him what it was. 'It's a period,' he replied. 'I
can see that,' said the teacher, 'but what is so exciting about a period?
'Darned if I know,' he said, 'but this morning my sister was missing one, my
mom fainted, my dad had a heart attack, and the boy next door joined the
Navy.'
exciting and relate it to the class the next day.
When the time came to present what they'd found, the first little boy the
teacher called on walked up to the front of the class, and with a piece of
chalk, made a small white dot on the blackboard and sat back down.
Puzzled, the teacher asked him what it was. 'It's a period,' he replied. 'I
can see that,' said the teacher, 'but what is so exciting about a period?
'Darned if I know,' he said, 'but this morning my sister was missing one, my
mom fainted, my dad had a heart attack, and the boy next door joined the
Navy.'
How to Tell the Sex of a Fly
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her
husband stalking around with a fly swatter
'What are you doing?' She asked.
'Hunting Flies' He responded.
'Oh. ! Killing any?' She asked.
'Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,' he replied.
Intrigued, she asked.
'How can you tell them apart?'
He responded,
'3 were on a beer can,
2 were on the phone.
husband stalking around with a fly swatter
'What are you doing?' She asked.
'Hunting Flies' He responded.
'Oh. ! Killing any?' She asked.
'Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,' he replied.
Intrigued, she asked.
'How can you tell them apart?'
He responded,
'3 were on a beer can,
2 were on the phone.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
6 Brazilian men
A Blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster
says
6 Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.
The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing 'That's horrible.
Confused, he says, 'Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving,
and,
there is that risk involved..
After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, 'How many is a
Brazilian?
says
6 Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.
The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing 'That's horrible.
Confused, he says, 'Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving,
and,
there is that risk involved..
After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, 'How many is a
Brazilian?
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